We thought we would present you with a list of top 10 jokes, according to Reddit voters on /r/Jokes! Here they are as of January 2017. We will try to keep this list updated as new jokes arrive on reddit and rise in their rankings. As usual, we took away the jokes that were not family-friendly.
Top Ten Funniest Reddit Jokes
- My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that, 2:30am?!
-Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes
- Why are white people the scariest in prison?
-Because you know they’re guilty.
- George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God.
God asks Bush: “What do you believe in?”
Bush replies: “I believe in a free economy, a strong America, the American nation and so on …”
God is impressed by Bush and tells him: “Great, come sit on the chair on my right.”
God goes to Obama and asks: “What do you believe in?”
Obama replies: “I believe in democracy, helping the poor, world peace, etc. …”
God is really impressed by Obama and tells him: “Well done, come sit on the chair on my left.”
Finally, God asks Trump: “What do you believe in”?
Trump replies: “I believe you’re sitting on my chair.”
- A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender pours them and the man immediately downs them one after another. The bartender says ” are you ok, I’ve never seen anyone drink like that.” The man replied “if you had what I have you would drink like that too.” The bartender asks “that’s rough, what do you have?”The man replies “about $.50”.
- This morning i used redbull instead of water to make my coffee.
-After 15 minutes of driving on the highway, i realized i left my car at home!
- What do you call a guy who does not fart in public?
-A private tutor.
- Pessimist: Oh, this can’t get any worse!
-Optimist: Yes, it can!
- What are the strongest days of the week?
-Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
- A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem…
-He says,”Give me 2 shots…”
The bartender cuts him off saying,”You only get one shot.”
- Who would survive if Trump and Clinton both were stranded on a island?
This one almost made it:
11. What rock group has 4 dudes that don’t sing?
– Mount Rushmore